“It is better to live without eyes than without a brain. I was lucky”. Story of a soldier who lost eyesight

“Your brain is great, your heart is a bomb, live and prosper”

“My mom said: ‘It would have been better if it hit you in the head, you were wearing a helmet,’ the fighter laughs into the phone. His mom thinks it would have saved her son's eyesight.

At first, he believed his eyes were covered with earth and debris. The blast wave caused a fist-sized bruise on the right side of his face, which grew larger every minute and eventually covered his eye.

On the other hand, the muscles clamped down on his left eye and did not allow him to open it. Oleksandr tore it open with his hands. It did not help.

Then another shell hit. The debris hit his hands. He swore and screamed for a long time. He was freezing. Without waiting for help, he moved blindly. Now he is amazed: he considers it a miracle that he did not run into trees and made it to the Ukrainian dugout alive. From there he was taken to the hospital.

I am grateful to the Kharkiv surgeon who immediately told me the truth: ‘You will not see.’ His voice was kind. I can tell people by their voices. And then he added: ‘Your brain is great, your heart is a bomb, live and prosper!”Oleksandr Yurchenko, veteran

Laughing, the veteran assures: “I think it's better to live without eyes than without a brain. I was lucky indeed. My face is not beaten — it is clean as a whistle. I have only 13 stitches under one eye.”

I don't know whether to be surprised by his optimism or his sense of humor. I'll figure it out later: Oleksandr is one of those people who do not give up. People like that are called live wire.

Despite the ophthalmologist's words that his eyesight would not return, the man cherished a tiny hope:

“I did not believe in bionic prostheses. I didn't want to be taken to some Austrian clinic. I just wanted an American doctor, Richard, to check me. He was at the Unbreakable in Lviv.

Before that, I asked the military guys: “I want to understand what is wrong with my eyes. Is there any hope? They answered honestly: ‘There is no hope’.”

The doctor came in, lifted his eyelids, and silently left. Yurchenko realized that he was out of luck. He did not even ask anyone about his diagnosis — the destruction of his eyeballs — for two weeks: what difference does it make what they call it — the main thing is that you cannot see.

Cigarettes put me back on my feet

The next day after Richard's visit, the Society of the Blind visited Oleksandr. They brought him a cane — he still calls it a “log”. They showed him how to use it. And then they brought some man to the veteran.

They told me: “Here's Volodymyr — he's been blind since birth. He will set up your phone and teach you what's what.” And I was surprised: a blind man would set up my phone? I had seen only one blind person in my life — an old man. And then this Volodymyr grabbed my phone and started adjusting it! I had an epiphany.”Oleksandr Yurchenko, veteran

Today, the veteran knows how to use a phone, but he prefers to play music on his laptop. He says he learned to be independent in the hospital. A nurse fed him once, but he refused the second time: “I have my hands, I can do it myself.”

Suddenly, a bad habit became useful. In his first hospital, back in Kharkiv, Oleksandr was allowed to smoke in the ward's toilet. But in the Lviv rehabilitation center, it was banned: “We don't allow smoking. You can only smoke outside.”

The wounded soldier asked what floor he was on and how far he had to go. It turned out that he was on the sixth...

“I cursed, took a stick, and walked. That's how I learned to walk. The cigarettes put me on my feet,” the man describes in detail how he got to the elevator by feeling, asked someone to take him outside, and then got back the same way.

The veteran wants other wounded who have lost their eyesight to follow the same path as he did. That is, to become independent as soon as possible.

I talked to many people. This one has been visually impaired for 7 years — he started walking only 3 years ago. This one stays in his bed. I talk to them, and they sound resentful. They regret how and where they got injured. But I have no regrets because no one drove me to war. I went on my own.Oleksandr Yurchenko, veteran

I asked other blind people how they lived. One guy's mom takes care of him, the other one has his neighbor buying him beer. “I said, 'Well done. I would have traveled all over Ukraine in so many years’,” the man is angry.

He did not allow his parents to visit him

The veteran spent several months in a rehabilitation center, supporting the wounded, both those without sight and those with other injuries. He admits now that it was not easy.

“I held on for a long time so as not to get depressed so that no one would get hurt by my outbursts. There were good people there — I didn't want to show them my other side. But after four months, it started to shoot up in me. I started picking on the guys: ‘What is this? Why don't you walk?’” he repeats his then intonations with a challenge.

He admits that he was depressed. He was also afraid that in the hospital he would hit his head on the end of the door.

I overcame my fear and started walking even faster. And the fact that I made others laugh made me feel better. I don't know how else to do it. When the wounded saw a blind man running around the hospital, they felt not so much down.Oleksandr Yurchenko, veteran

When people asked him why his family did not visit him, he answered sharply: “Do you think I have a dysfunctional family? I have a great family.”

He explains that if his mother or father came (he lives with them), he would make them go back. He didn't want to hear them crying. He didn't want them to adjust his pillows, bring him coffee in bed, or take him by the hand. He knows that it would have disturbed him. It would not allow him to harden.

The man is convinced: “I would have instantly slipped into depression. I would have atrophied. I would not do anything; I would command my family.”

Even when he returned home, he asked his parents not to do anything for him. He learned to walk around the house on his own.

“If you don't get hit, if you don't bleed, you won't learn. This is the only way. You may stumble over the same threshold a hundred times, but you cross it on the first one. And you did a good job because you have learned where that threshold is and how high it is.”

So far, Oleksandr's vestibular apparatus is still not working properly: when he walks, he gets staggering. Doctors assure him that not enough time has passed since his injury. However, the veteran is determined to speed up his recovery: “I want to get back to my old self as soon as possible. That's why I was walking on the 20th day after being wounded.”

Camp “Life After War”: making borscht and getting married!

Oleksandr speaks to me from a support and rehabilitation camp for veterans who lost their eyesight in the war, as well as their family members. It is organized by the National Assembly of People with Disabilities.

The two-week camp takes place from time to time in many cities. This time it was in Vinnytsia. The course of social adaptation and rehabilitation offered there is the only one in Ukraine.

“The team here is good, they put their hearts and souls into it. I got eye prostheses for aesthetics. Even my eye color was chosen — brown. Now I can walk around without glasses, and before I had them, I could only scare children,” the man jokes.

In the camp, blind veterans are taught many things: how to navigate in a room and larger spaces, how to walk outside, and how to match clothes by color and texture. Veterans learn to use computers, and phones, read Braille, and even cook.

Oleksandr is happy: “I'm good at peeling potatoes. I think when I get home, I'll make borsch!”

He tells us about a friend who is in the camp for the second time. After the first time, he became so confident and brave that he met a sighted girl. During the second camp, he proposed to her. And she said yes!

Yurchenko says he will use all the information from the team. Most of all, he is interested in people like him, who are completely blind.

Some people like to be helped, but I'm interested in those who can do it themselves. I went to pick up my documents from the military enlistment office myself, I went to rehabilitation myself, and I got here by bus. A year after the injury, I plan to run and play football. I still have six months left.”Oleksandr Yurchenko, veteran